Your brain is not being mean

Hey Reader,

I was worried! I’m SO glad you’re finally here!

What happens when you ‘update’ your “story”?

The label you’ve been wearing like a name tag at a conference — “introvert,” “shy,” “not a public speaker”… isn’t a “fact”.

It’s just a story your brain keeps telling because it likes being consistent.

Here’s the wild part: your brain doesn’t care if the story is “good for you”.

It just wants the story to “match”.

So if you’ve been telling yourself you’re the kind of person who freezes up before speaking, hesitates before hitting record, or goes quiet in a room full of people — your brain goes, “Sounds right, let’s keep doing that.”

Psychology keeps pointing to the same culprit every time: “Identity”.

The good news, you can “Update” it!

Psychology backs this up. Behavior change doesn’t start with motivation or discipline. It starts with how you SEE yourself.

The fix isn’t more affirmations written on sticky notes…

Your brain needs “evidence”. Not encouragement.

Small actions that confirm a ‘new story’ about who you are.

Real actions that prove to your brain you’re becoming someone “different”.

How?

Start by USING your voice anywhere you can!

Stop texting and send a voice message instead.

Speak up in your next meeting! (even if it’s just one sentence.)

Read something “out loud” today! (Seriously, right now if you want.)

These aren’t magic tricks. They’re receipts.

Proof that you’re becoming someone who uses their voice with confidence.

Those little moments aren’t small. They’re votes for your new identity.

And whatever you do, stop introducing yourself as “not really a public speaker.” That label is a cage you built yourself and keep walking back into.

Your brain is wired to tell a consistent story about WHO you are.

And if that story includes “I’m an introvert,” “I’m not a public speaker,” or

“I just freeze up in the moment,” your brain will work overtime to make sure that story stays true.

It’s not being mean. It’s just doing its job.

The best speakers aren’t “fearless”…

They just stopped letting their “old identity” make decisions for them.

“Identity” is everything!

Stellar Quotes

“Words do two major things: They provide food for the mind and create light for understanding.”

Jim Rohn

“You’re never going to kill storytelling, because it’s built in the human plan. We come with it.”

Margaret Atwood

Arrived in a wet bathing suit and still killed it!

Bullhead City, Arizona. No traffic lights. A Rock & Roll DJ who was also the only guy playing Rock within 50 miles!

That was ME! 18 years old. KRHS in Bullhead City. The station’s call letters stood for “Radio Holiday Shores” — a planned community built for the seasoned crowd who wanted sunshine, soft music, and supper by six.

I’d water ski all day right from my dock on the Colorado River. At 4:45, I’d hop on my dirt bike and head to work. Still “dripping”.

My shift started at 5:00 p.m. sharp. The first order of business was reading the News off a teletype machine. Second order of business was “Dinner Date” — two hours of reel-to-reel tapes so smooth they’d make Lawrence Welk blush.

(Google him. Seriously.)

I took THAT time to go ‘hit on’ the check-out girls at the grocery store!

(don’t tell the owners!) (C’mon, I was 18!)

But at 7:00 PM? The whole town was mine.

I became the only Rock & Roll DJ in probably 50 miles.

Requests weren’t just for songs. They were invitations to that night’s parties!

Being the only Rock DJ in town had its perks…

(especially when you’re 18 and trying to score a cold beer.)

Minor celebrity status goes a long way in a desert river town!

Then winter hit.

The snowbirds flew back home, the parties dried up, and Bullhead City got real quiet, real fast.

I knew I had to get to a bigger market.

One phone call from Radio legend Rich “Brother” Robin, and I was off to Tucson to work at a station quietly co-owned by Don Imus and Robert W. Morgan!

Two genuine legends!

Both were operating with a very loose interpretation of “professional.”

Since this was “pre-sobriety” for both of them, our meetings were epic!

Lifestyle-wise, it was probably my favorite station, Reader!

I won’t bore you with the whole list, but after Tucson, I did “Mornings” in some amazing cities. San Diego, Phoenix, Kansas City, Portland…

But here’s what I took from every single stop along my U-Haul-powered Radio career… How to make a connection through a microphone that feels like you’re talking to “one person” instead of thousands.

Diversions

Your Thoughts

Gut check time:
Which of these sounds most like you these days?

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